March 19, 2005 - Early Morning

Blogger is still giving us problems posting pics, but we wanted to share TAnn's visit from Friday: "7:10 I arrived and she was a bit more awake. Her days always begin with Kurt arriving to give her a good morning kiss and see that she is OK before he goes to work. As it was St. Patrick's day and Kurt told her this, she slected some jeans with cross-stitch on the bottom (totally cute) and a green sweatshirt It's a bit chilly at CNS and she's so tiny that we try to see that she is warm...surely don't want her to get a cold as her little body is trying so much to heal other parts at this point in time.

So it's up and a shower for her and getting dressed. As she is still unable to stand in the shower, we move the shower chair in for her and the RA assists though Amanda does have the "hend held shower spray" and do a lot of that for herself. They always shampoo her hair and do at least part of the dressing in the bathroom. Amanda's schedule is the "early one" and her roomie, Amy, goes to CNS later.

Christine / Kurt had bought her a "Happy Shamrock Day" puffed felt ornament to wear and aftr she dried her hair, and we went to the living / dining / kitchen, I gave her the ornament and she tried to get it pinned on but was a bit frustrated that she couldn't get it on so I gave her a bit of help.

She ate her usual healthy breakfast of Yogurt with fruit (2 of them) and a couple of glasses of juice and of course her water. When I give her a glass of water, many times she says: "That's the best." We are fortunate that she really likes to eat healthy for I know that is a big part of why she is doing so well.

The nurse comes in and administers her morning meds and then she brushes her teeth and we vacate the bathroom so her roomie can get her day started. They commented at CNS that on Friday she "always looks so pretty" as I always get her makeup out so she can put it on. Kay, her counselor, commented on this and asked Amanda (we were with her from 1 - 2 PM) "Would you like to wear your makeup every day?" Amanda said, "Yes I would." So Kay said she would try to communicate with staff to give her access to her makeup every day as we are doing all we can to help her "be back to our Amanda" as soon as possible.

She has her backpack on the back of her wheelchair and Kurt told me it was her travel backback and serves well as a holder for her "memory book" and other items she might need duirng the day at CNS. We always take her glasses and medication for her left eye in the event that it nees attention. Kurt keeps lip gloss there for her but I always ask if she wants lipstick and so far she says "yes" every time. We get tissues, and put her lipstick so it is accessible for her; then her lunch (which Kurt lovingly and fiathfully prepares) goes on the back of her wheelchair.

So by 8:30 AM she is up, dressed with her makeup on beautifully and selected an orange lite jacket to wear over the green sweatshirt. They have an enormous van with a lift and the residents are wheeled, or some can wheel themselves to the van, but they wait in line to roll the chairs on the lift. They have a safety strap that is fastened in back of the resident's chair and they are required to have 2 people (one on each side of the resident) as the lift takes the chair up to the van. It's about 2 - 3 feet but they are very careful with them.

Sometimes we have to wait in line to board the van, hence the necessity for the little jacket / coat or whatever. And, sometimes she is on the van for 10-15 minutes waiting for other residents to be safely boarded or assisted. It is so touching to see the staff there tirelessly work with each one and know their level of care needed. Once on the van she tranfers to a regular seat and the chair is folded and sometimes it is transported on yet another van and awaits her arrival at CNS. Some residents cannot transfer so the ones who can are encouraged to sit in the seats on the van.

As i said before, they ALWAYS comment on how pretty she looks and she smiles and she ALWAYS says "thank you" as the gracious little lady she is. What a rare and lovely treasure we hae in her!

As soon as she is safely boarded, I go to "her window" blow her a kiss, and I drive to CNS; about 5 miles? and wait for her to arrive. Again whe she arrives, she receives the same compliments and never fails to say thank you.

We are off to place her lunch in the refrigerator and I tell her we put it there so it will say fresh and we will get it at lunch time. With TBI's repetition is important so they can begin to "process" ritual and daily ctivities. Long ago I raised a little boy and understand the necessity of saying "wash your ears" several times. It's much the same with a TBI: explain WHAT we are doing then tell WHY we are doing that particular thing.

We check the daily schedule, go to the first session. Speech is usually first and I'm glad they have switched her for her communication is much better now that she goes there first for she is more alert in the earlier part of the day. Yesterday was much the same, i.e., make the daily schedule, alphabetize, identify photos, etc.

PT was next and the entire session was spent alternately pacing her feet in warm and cold water. She doesn't like doing this at all (nor would I) and is very verbal saying "This sucks!" each time. I try to keep her distrcted as Sara times her sessions of one minute in the warm and one in the cold. Her right foot is left in the bucket of warm water all the time. They say this helping to desentize her brain and help with the discomfort she continually feels in her left foot. So, no walking at all yesterday ~~~

OT was spent in a session with Sandra (therapist) and another TBI who comes daily to the center. Ron is 58 but told us he was 22. Amanda had been saying for weeks she was 46 but now continually states her correct age of 40. YEA! Progress!!! We each stated our name, age, where we from and then we were each asked to repeat each person's name, age, etc. LOL, though I remembered every name, I didn't remember the ages of the 4 of us.

Amanda was able to say every name, and her age and my age. She didn't remember Sandra's or Ron's but she really tried....things we take so easily for granted are things she must relearn. I'm grateful for each bit of progress I see but it is still heartbreaking to see her struggle so much.

Lunch. Again it is important to give her one item at a time as there are many distractions in the dining area. Everyone eats at the same time and they have a huge TV showing (well it is shown on the back wall) CNN repeating the same news ... She is seated with her back to the wall so she can / will focus on eating. She usually does pretty well but LOL, yesterday Kurt had made her a grilled cheese. Staff warmed it for her so it would tase better. She cook a couple of bies but that was all. I asked her why she wouldn't eat it and she said, "Well, it's not special" Kurt smiled when I told him about that last evening.

After lunch the only thing remaining was counseling and I mentioned the blog to Kay who was very interested in checking this out and she promptly retrieved her laptop and logged on. Amanda didn't remember that we have this set up for her but was very interested and wanted to see the site. Kay read the report of last Friday to Amanda and stopped frequently to comment / discuss things with Amanda. When asked why she is at CNS and how she got hurt, usually she says it was an automobile accident. Yesteray, she said "I got my foot hurt" but later she will be able to recall how / why she is at CNS. Just one of the things we keep saying over and over.......

Kay asked Amanda if she would like to log on to the blog at home and read it and she said she would so I communicated this to Kurt. The days pass quickly when they are home on Saturday and Sunday and he will do his best to see that she gets to read it if there is time and she feels like doing it. Kurt said that ya'll had intened for her to be able to read / reply to people as soon as shc can so to the writers / readers, keep checking for she may soon be able (maybe with assistance from Kurt) be able send some short messages...we sincerely hope so.

Back to her apartment where she went to the sofa and was completely absored in People magazine. I take them weekly from the Dr's office where I work and she reads it from cover to cover. Everything! So she is becoming more and more aware of things "outside Amanda" and that is another good sign.

She always has a healthy snack and again had yogurt and several pieces of celery Kurt had cut for her. Water....lotz of it! We elevate her foot but YEA again, yesterday she kept her brace on the entire day except for the time in PT where she was doing the water in the bucket thing. She did not ask for her shoe and the brace to be removed until after Kurt arrived. That is more progres as she usually wants to remove her shoe / brace when she arrives at her apartment.

Kurt needed to get the oil changed and a flat tire repaired so he didn't arrive at the usual 4:30 so I explained to Amanda that he was taking care of things (told her exactly what he was doing as it is important for us to help her understand events as they relate to time and her schedule.)

He prepared ham and steamed asparagus for her and she ate fairly well. Seems she eats better when he is there with her and again I see that as positive and her feeling of reconnecting to their life together. Back to the sofa to finish the issue of People she was reading. Again I cannot tell you how very much Kurt is doing a fantastic job of caring for her. He is so patient and continually shows his love for her....every woman should have such a loving husband. He is amazing....=
Kurt is doing well. We share the evenings, i.e., he goes immediately after work and lets me have the 7:30 until she goes to sleep. That way he can accomplish what he needs to at home such as taking care of errands, etc.

Oh, I must share this with you and you can decide what to post. We all know Amanda has this most marvelous personality.........

Last Monday evening I met a friend of mine at a swanky local restaurant where we celebrated our birthdays together. Mine was in January but I was't in much of a mood to celebrate and Yolanda's is this month. I wore black pants and a velvety top to the office and changed before I left the hospital to a long black skirt that is slit both front and back. I took my pants so I could change at Amanda's apartment. I had on black 3" heels and the heels are gold metallic. (I THINK THIS IS WONDERFUL - I walked in and gave my usual greeting of "How's Amanda today?" she said fine. THEN: "You're dressed like a slut!" Just completely cracked us up! I was crying for I was so thrilled that she is "processing" my style of dress and that is something she would say to me if she thought that.....

Kurt said, "Amanda!" And LOL, she said, "Well she is. She's 65 and dressed that way." I was elated! So not that I want everyone to know that I was wearing 3" heels and a slit skirt, but it's great that she is having her former thoughs..........LOL, guess it's good to be honest?

Kurt left for the evening about 8ish for he has to get his daily "Amanda Fix" and we got ready for bed. Elevate the foot and finished People. Again she amazed me by folding the magazine and saying: "Thomas Ann, tell me what is on your mind." WoW! What a gal! So we had a fairly good conversation for I told her I was thinking of her and being grateful for all of the progress she is maing, etc. She still gets her words mixed up at times and does not identify things correctly but for the most part we do understand what she is tring to communicate.
Today is a rainy day in this area but hopefully she and Kurt will have two wonderful days together.

Another sign of progress: one evening last week (can't recall which one as I'm there 4 eveings) Kurt was telling her good night and she said: "Do you have the car keys or do you want me to drive?" I know this might seem trivial but it's all good stuff.........so post whatever you wish but I don't want to be too repetive. But my dear, this is her life for now and Kurt is alwys there for her.